Let me tell you about a guy I know. His real name is not important, so let’s call him Lagrange. He is about 5 ft 8, extremely dedicated to the gym, has a great physique, and does boxing. If you look at him from outside, you would think this guy has everything sorted out — discipline, routine, focus, and physical strength. But the moment the topic of relationships appears, the system crashes completely.
Earlier in life Lagrange actually tried talking to girls. But things did not work well. Conversations felt awkward and nothing really landed properly. Now normally people learn from that and try again later. But Lagrange chose a different strategy. Instead of trying again, he built a full philosophy explaining why relationships are useless.
Suddenly he started saying things like:
Basically a lot of deep philosophical sounding talk, which honestly feels more like someone trying to justify giving up.
Instead of dealing with the situation, Lagrange filled his life with endless activities. Gym. Boxing. Running. Trekking. Crazy adventures. Health routines. Every conversation with him somehow becomes a lecture about vitamin D, cortisol levels, morning sunlight, discipline, protein intake, and mental toughness.
Listening to him sometimes feels like attending a seminar on human optimization. But honestly it looks like a very complicated way of avoiding relationships.
Then a girl joined his boxing coaching. She clearly liked him. Not in a confusing way — in a very obvious way. She talked to him normally, showed interest, and even asked him out several times.
After many attempts he finally agreed to go out once.
And what was his brilliant conclusion after that?
“She is psycho.”
Which is funny because this guy has never been in a relationship in his entire life. So his understanding of normal relationship behavior is probably zero. When someone genuinely likes you, they might show enthusiasm or act a little extra. That’s normal. But for Lagrange it apparently looks like a psychological disorder.
The girl is also in the same institute as us, and Lagrange introduced me to her once. When I spoke with her, it was extremely obvious that she genuinely liked him. You could literally see the affection in her eyes when she talked about him.
I tried explaining this to him many times. I told him maybe he should actually give it a chance.
Nothing worked.
Recently during Holi she asked him if they could spend time together.
He rejected her.
His reason?
“I already have plans.”
Sounds reasonable — until you find out what the plan actually was.
Getting high on bhang.
Apparently that counts as a more important plan than spending time with someone who actually likes him.
At this point I honestly do not understand this guy anymore.
There are only two explanations that make sense:
Because otherwise it is very difficult to explain how someone can build muscles, track hormones, run marathons, climb mountains, and still panic when a girl simply says “let’s go out.”
Lagrange may be extremely strong in the gym.
But when it comes to relationships, this guy is lifting exactly zero kilograms.